Sunday, March 28, 2010

Sicilian Pregnancy



An 18 year old Sicilian girl tells her mother that she missed her period for 2 months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, 'Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!'

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with grey hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the Ferrari and enters the house. He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them: 'Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge. I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life.

Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach-front villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account. If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?'

At this point, the father, who had remained silent holding a shot gun, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him. 'You gonna try again.'

Friday, March 26, 2010

Poems on Overseas Filipinos




Online poems focus on overseas Filipinos is featured at:
http://marnescriptsmain.blogspot.com/

Read a sample for poet Rio Alma

Hulíng Hudhud
Ng Sanlibong Pagbabalik at Paglimot
Para sa Filipinas Kong Mahal

(Sipì)

Imbitasyon sa Manlalakbay


Kaluluwa kaming tambing
Sa Purgatoryo nanggáling
Doon po ang gawa namin
Araw-gabi’y manalangin.

Kung kami po’y lilimusan
Dali-daliin po lámang
Bakâ kami’y mapagsarhan
Ng pinto sa kalangitan.
—Pangaluluwa


Tangrib, lawas ng umaalon-along alindog,
Pana-panahon kang naglalakbay sa kaniyang katawan,
Isang kapuluan ng iwinisik at tumigas na luha,
Pira-pirasong kasaysayan ng poot at pagtataksil,
Namamarilong laging mga utong ng bulkan,
Kapatagan ng mapagpaubayang uhay at gulay,
Malalantik na baybaying
Halinhinang nilalalik ng malilibog na káti’t taog.
Sinasamba mo siyá
Sinasamba mo siyá mulang Simunul hanggang Itbayat.
Sinasamba mo ang bahaghari
Ng sampung libong wika’t balangay
Na iniwi sa singit at tuktok ng kaniyang mga bundok,
Sa siko’t siha ng kaniyang mga danaw at ilog.
Sinasamba mo ang matatanda’t bagong lungsod:
Pamána ng kaniyang winaldas na kabataan,
Regalo ng mga pangahas ngunit mapanlupig na pag-ibig.
Bayan ko?

Ay! Tíla siyá ilahas na libay at kay hirap angkinin.
Tíla siyá hulagway na dumudulas at umaalpas
Sa anumang panukala’t pakana ng haraya.
Nilalakbay mo ang kaniyang katawan
Sa pag-asang ganap mo siyáng makikilála’t maipakikilála;
Muli’t muli mong binabalikan ang mga bukal niya’t busáy,
Inaaninaw ang kaniyang mga ubaning batis,
Sinisipat ang kaniyang mga tagaytay at talampas,
Binibílang ang mga butil ng pawis at bigas
Sa bawat palad ng kaniyang mamamayan
Upang muli siyáng tuklasin,
Likhain,
Kipilin,
At itanghal na anyo ng iyong sarili.